Vital Viewing (The Muses Are Heard Edition)

The last time I posted was the day before the presidential election. Some of you may have been wondering why I haven't posted since then. I just haven't had the time. You see, I've been busy...

  

...sulking. Well, maybe more than sulking. OK, I don't have wings (or curves), but this is pretty much the way I've felt lately. Obviously, things didn't go the way I had hoped.

But I'm not sulking anymore! I picked myself up and brushed myself off and found a way to deal with the political calamity that has now befallen our country. Take a gander:

 

 

Um, I'm suddenly hearing murmurs of disapproval.

See? Margaret Forster (author of Georgy Girl) has my back!

Now that we've established that it's wonderful, what's the best way to escape the horrors of topicality? Well, one tried-and-true method is a...

...Hays Office-approved old Hollywood movie:

 

Ah, what a diversion--What's that? You don't feel like you were escaping anything? What you need is a strong dose of silliness, and you can't get much sillier than this...

... BNL (before Norman Lear)-era situation comedy:

After watching that, you very well can't say your current affairs anxieties haven't all been swept away.

Huh? THEY HAVEN'T? Obviously, a stronger broom is needed. So instead of silliness, I'll provide you with some downright mindless...

...slapstick:

HAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm lost in laughter, without a world-historical care in the world, and I'm sure you are too.

What do you mean your world-historical cares have increased? Boy, what a tough crowd.

All right, as one last resort, I want you all to escape into the innocence of childhood. Specifically, those nights when your mother or father would read you a...

 ...bedtime story:

There! I knew that would do it. Now you can puff up the pillow, pull up the blanket, and dream of a world devoid of any kind of news other than box scores and celebrity gossip. Isn't escapism wonderful?

Oh, there's still one naysayer out there, telling me I'm being irresponsible, that I should confront reality, not run away from it.

Look, naysayer, I never said I was planning to escape forever, just temporarily. And as far as confronting reality goes, I'll have you know that in order to have a better understanding of the election results, I've been reading this book:

So far nothing about fellating a microphone, but maybe that's in a later edition.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vital Viewing (That's Enfranchisement Edition)

 

For those of you who live in Ohio, the deadline to register to vote in the 2024 elections is October 7, this coming Monday. Above are all the things you need to know and do and be in order to register. However, it may not be all that easy to read as at some point the words shrink quite a bit (just what you need in an election where there's bound to be accusations of fraud and voter suppression: small print.) So as a further service I've included the following video provided by the good people at the Cuyahoga County Board of Election themselves in the hope of making things a bit more clear:

Get all that? Good. Now just to make sure you do everything you're supposed to do to fully participate in our democracy, I'd like to add a cautionary tale of what could happen if you DON'T do everything you're supposed to do.

Actually, this cautionary tale takes place in the Queens, New York of the 1970s but I think it applies equally well to Cuyahoga County, Ohio of the 2020s as a man of many, many opinions suddenly finds himself unable to act upon a single one of those opinions. Watch:

Don't end up like Archibald. Register!

 

Nominee Anomaly

 

Anybody expecting...

...this...

...should run out and get me several months' supply of...

...these.

 

 

 

Serendipity

 

It may not be Lourdes or Fatima, but I'll take it.