Tuesday, March 18, 2025

Vital Viewing (Precious Meddles Edition)

 


Ah, yes, Fort Knox, where some 147.3 million ounces of gold bullion is stored--or is it? New doubts have been raised:




What I gathered from watching that is, no matter what the conspiracy theorists say, the gold is there after all. Still, in the off-chance it's not, what can the United States do to stave off...whatever bad thing that happens if the gold isn't there?


 
The solution may lie in one of our oldest fairy tales. Take it away, Edward:
 


Turnips instead of gold? In that case we would need Fort Knox more than ever. After all, turnips are vegetables and as such last much longer in a...



 ...sealed container.


 

10 comments:

  1. I can't remember which of our televisions stations showed Fractured Fairy Tales, probably the government broadcaster ABC. I used to enjoy them.

    Fort Knox could well just be an empty edifice. Has anyone walked around it to check?

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    Replies
    1. Andrew, I guess that's what that Trump fellow plans on doing--once he can some time out from shredding the Constitution.

      Delete
  2. Never try to defend yourself against a narcissist.
    They already know you're right, they just want you to go crazy trying to prove it.

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    Replies
    1. Mike, I don't have to defend but I can poke fun.

      Delete
  3. Loved this. So nice to be reminded of Edward Everett Horton and Fractured Fairy Tales. I can’t imagine those stories without him as narrator.

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    1. Mitchell, I'm glad you said that. Horton had either the perfect voice, or the perfect acting style, or both, to perform that role. He could have treated the whole thing as a put-on (which of course it was.) Instead, he played it perfectly straight, sounding much like an authentic children's storyteller in the process, and then when it came time to deliver a joke, or just comment on the joke, his tone would take on a bit of irony without overdoing it. He was brilliant.

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  4. Hi Kirk, Well, I don't see any guards in either of the pictures you show, lending credence to your theory.

    By the way, in the U.S. I don't think I ever ate a turnip (although we did try a rutabaga once), but in Asia, they are very common (in a closely related form--think daikon), and they are delicious in many recipes. Also, in early American cookbooks, I see turnips prepared in many of the same ways they are here.
    --Jim

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    Replies
    1. Jim, I don't know if I've ever knowingly had a turnip.

      There's an episode of Green Acres where the citizens of Hooterville decide they should promote rutabagas in much the same fashion that Florida promotes oranges. To that end, they decide to start their own Rutabaga Bowl. Something to watch on New Years Day.

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In order to keep the hucksters, humbugs, scoundrels, psychos, morons, and last but not least, artificial intelligentsia at bay, I have decided to turn on comment moderation. On the plus side, I've gotten rid of the word verification.