Saturday, December 30, 2017

Vital Viewing (Gregorian Calender Edition)

                                                       You are cordially invited to attend


Free Food!

Free Drinks!!

Free Lavatory!!!

 State of the art design, too!

Live Entertainment! 



(Don't worry. They take requests.)

There will be a dance floor! 

 (Management will not be to blame if your date leaves without you.)

If your birthday falls on December 31, you get in at half-price!

(Um...I already said the whole shebang is free, didn't I? Let me rephrase that...)

If your birthday falls on December 31, you get to leave and come back again!

Dress code strictly enforced!

"I don't see anything hanging out, do you? Let 'em in!"

Proper ID required!

"OK, let me see your driver's licenses...hmm...only one of them looks legit, so..."

" can stay, but the other one will have to leave."

If at the end of the night you are too inebriated to drive, management will arrange a ride home for you.

(That's the best I can do. Uber is all booked up tonight, and the taxicab companies have all gone under.)


Huh? You mean you're already here? In that case, let the festivities begin...


(Yeah, I know it's past their bedtime, but I promised them they could stay up late.)

Well, that was fun, wasn't it? But the party's winding down now...

Myself, Judy, Mel, Spanky, Alfalfa, Buckwheat, Darla, Miss Crabtree, Cyndi, Mariah, Julie, Gaga, The Honorable Mr. Mayor, Dick, Johnny, Rosey, Ray, Maureen, another Johnny, Donna, George, Henri, Julia, Fred, Rita, Gene, Cyd, Marilyn, Truman, Joan, Harry, Christopher, Michael, Guy, and a dozen or so people whose names I didn't get would like to wish you all...

                                                          A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
OK, now hurry up and get out of here, because...

...the landlady is liable to show up at any moment.


  1. Hi, Kirk!

    Wowie, good buddy! You threw one heck of a New Year's Eve party. Many memories came flooding back as I scrolled down, not the least of which was one of my favorite terrible horror flicks The Thing With Two Heads starring Ray and Rosey. I remember Guy Lombardo's televised NYE party and even more so I remember Johnny Carson breaking away from his Tonight Show for the ball drop in Times Square. Veteran radio broadcaster Ben Grauer reminds us how great reporters were in the early and mid 20th century. His spontaneous, unscripted commentary on the assembled multitude in Times Square was brilliant. I watched all of the ball drop videos with great interest. I was only 41 days old when the world welcomed the year 1950. It was great to watch 1965 turn into 1966 knowing that I was in my mid teens and about to experience what I still consider to be the greatest year of my life as a card carrying Dell Rat. The 1990 ball drop clip featured singer/actor Michael Damian whom I was watching practically every weekday in the role of Cricket's bf Danny Romalotti on The Young And The Restless. It also reminded me of the long running ABC broadcast New Year's Rockin' Eve hosted by Dick Clark (a shameless rip-off of New Year's Rockin' Eve in the Shady hosted by Shady Seaweed). All kidding aside, the 1999 NYE broadcast gave us a glimpse of an aging Clark still doing a competent job as host. Four years later he suffered a stroke and missed the telecast, then returned the following year and several more but clearly disabled and unable to speak clearly. It was rather sad to see and hear. The Little Rascals (Our Gang) song at the end of the post with Darla, Buckwheat, Alfalfa, Spanky and the other kids reminds us that time marches on and waits for no man (or woman). It also reminds me that New Year's Eve used to be a huge deal when I was young. So were The World Series and the Miss America Pageant. Nowadays those special events aren't nearly as special, at least to me. Maybe it's a sign of getting old.

    Thanks for the truckload of memories, good buddy Kirk. Happy New Year to you. See you in 2018!

  2. Now that's the kind of New Years Party blow out I like to see. And it won't be the first time a ostrich would take me home. Some of those clips were funny from the videos. I can't think of a place to drop my balls. I meant, watch a ball drop!!! Now excuse me while I go to cut some rug on the dance floor... right after I finish this drink........


  3. Wowsers! Even Aunt Esther! But so unpleasant to see Kirk Cameron's face in that 1990 video! Maybe that was before he became holier than thou (and a complete idiot). But then Judy Garland and The Velvet Fog. What an incredible rendition of The Party's Over.

    1. Texting on cell phone, which is why I am keeping replies short, but, yes, before Cameron found the Lord.

      Happy New Year, Mitchell!

  4. Man, you know how to throw a party! I got so drunk that I'm only sobering up now, 2 days later! I gotta tell you though, that ostrich ride home was brutal. Happy New Year! And it was soooooooo nice to listen to Guy Lombardo and His Royal Canadians again. I miss them.

  5. Happy New Year, Debra! Sorry about the ostrich ride. Next year I'll provide an emu instead.